Hindsight

I lost my job recently. Its's been tough, I've done a lot of crying and moping and feeling sorry for myself. But that's not who I am. How I was fired does not reflect on my character but on the character of the person who fired me. I spent almost a decade of my life in that store, working with people I adore. I started in that building when I was a senior in high school, I spent formative years of my life there, I made lasting friendships that I hope never fade. I worked under 9 different general managers and was promoted to Apprentice (General Manager in training for those not familiar with my world) under the 9th one. I even promised to officiate her wedding. I sabotaged my love life multiple times for the sake of my job (note to self, do not tell guys you are interested in that you are 'married to the job' when asked about the potential for a romantic relationship). I went on multiple Disney vacations because that job paid me so well.I got business cards and nice shirts. Looking back at 7 years, I wish I could add many more. There's so much more I could do there, but we live and we learn. My first job was the greatest job I could have hoped for. I had so many people who had my back when I needed it. I learned that it is okay to ask for help sometimes. I shared my deepest traumas, I met some of my best friends, I made some enemies and caused some unnecessary drama because I was hurt. I worked through some of the most nationally traumatic months and I learned to enjoy life.

I worked over 50 hours a week for 2 years and took a handful vacations because I am incapable of stopping. That's why I started a blog, because I have been unemployed for almost 3 weeks and I am going off the deep end. But I think that's the point. I needed a break and I wouldn't take one. I was getting knocked down and I kept getting back up so God hit me the one-two punch and knocked me out. TKO.

I was regularly waking up at 4am to go to work at 6am and coming home well after 6pm. I was going to sleep at midnight and repeating the cycle day after day. Four hours of sleep a night will crush ones soul very slowly. I wouldn't have changed a thing. I loved those mornings. I loved my job. If any of you are reading this, I love you all so much and I hope to see you guys thrive without me there. I'm so proud of all of you but it's time for me to move on. I spent the best years of my life with you guys, I spent multiple birthdays surrounded by the people I love in the place I love. We survived holidays and random Thursdays in April and we all learned so much together. It's been a wild ride, but it's time for me to disembark. Live well. Work hard. Be kind. Tell me everything.